We have had a lot of sickness in this house over the last week. I have had dr. appts., kids staying home from school, and lots of little ones that need to be held.
My parents also arrived in town this week for a visit. We are so glad they could come. The kids have been excited to get some time with Papa and Grammy. They are in school still so that really limits the opportunities they are having to spend together. We are trying to make the most of every minute we can.
May is always a crazy month. It seems like the schools feel the need to pack every field trip, special day, concert, and party into this one month. When you multiply that by the 4 children that I have in school, I think some days my head might just spin off.
All of this is to say, I haven't had a chance to fully process all that I heard at the Orphan Summit. The overall sense that I went away from the weekend with was that I need to focus more on my children. I can be so consumed with orphan care that I leave my own kids fending for themselves at times.
Maybe I don't always prioritize going on that field trip or spending one on one time with one of my kids because I need to work on things for Beyond Survival, planning this event, making sure these kids get sponsored, etc.
I have 6 children that God has entrusted to me. Rick and I have made the decision for me to stay home for a reason. Don't get me wrong. I don't have to give up on the ministry that I have to Swaziland. I just need to regroup, gain some perspective. Taking care of my children, my home, and being a wife is more than a full time job. I am not sure I have done such a good job lately of prioritizing that.
It is funny that I would go to a conference on adoption and orphan care and come home feeling led in this way. Realizing that God has me in this season right now for a reason. There will be a season later when the kids are bigger and less needy where I will have more time available to work on Beyond Survival.
I feel very strongly that the needs of my kids should not take a back seat to the needs of the other children that I am ministering to. We have 2 children with sensory issues. Those don't just go away. They need help processing their lives daily. We have 2 adopted children that have issues to overcome based on the trauma they have faced those first days, months and years of their little lives. We have 2 more children that can get lost in the shuffle of dealing with all of those pressing issues of adoption and sensory processing disorder. I can't get this time back. It will be gone, and I want to look back knowing that I fulfilled this calling to its fullest.
Coming home from the conference just confirmed the things I was feeling in my heart while there. God has shown me this week how much my kids need me. God has been pounding into my stubborn head that I must shift my focus. I must regroup. I must live differently.
May is pretty crazy. I am continuing to look to June, hoping I can make this summer one that is a fun, regrouping time for our family.
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